defeating villains after dinner

[A snippet of conversation overheard while working on my laptop after dinner while the boys play.]

Creed and Denton are imagining that they're in a spaceship flying to Mars. They've set two mini trampolines up on end against each other to form a spaceship--their transport to various planets to complete their missions. In their first mission, Creed explains to Denton that he will likely encounter "Sand Monsters."

"AAAAAAGGGHHHH!!" Denton exclaims dramatically...but Creed quickly counters with "Nope. We're going to have to handle it." "Oh." Denton says, calming himself. Creed explains that the sand monsters have dangerous brains but it's okay because OUR brains are very hard. They shoot the sand monsters with lotion and declare triumphantly, "They melted into quesadillas!"

"Alright!!!" they cry, congratulating each other.

"Now you be my partner!"

"Okay!" says the other one.

"Now let's go to Mombasa."

"Okay. Good job."

"I spotted Carmen Sandiego's footsteps!"

"Yes...we've found another clue!"

"THERE SHE IS!!!" (sound of footsteps in hot pursuit)

"Too bad, Carmen Sandiego!" a small voice says with expansive authority. "You're under arrest!"

"Great job, Hawkins."

"Now let's go to the planet Lexicon!"

"Awright!"

"Hey, I see words everywhere! There's WORD GIRL!"

"Change into the Cheesy Monster."

"Okay!"

"THIS is a job for WORD GIRL!!!"

(Sound of fierce scuffling, and protests of "Hey--NO!! I'm a good guy! I'm your partner!!" Somehow that gets ironed out and the team moves on in crime-fighting power.)

"YOU are deFEATed!!" (sound of acapella background music pouring from small lips)

I love my life.

If You Give a Mom a Muffin

(Author unknown)

If you give a mom a muffin,
She'll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
She'll pour herself some.
Her three-year-old will spill the coffee.
She'll wipe it up.
Wiping the floor, she'll find dirty socks.
She'll remember she has to do laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer,
She'll trip over boots and bump into the freezer.
Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan for supper.
She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She'll look for her cookbook ("101 Things To Do With a Pound of Hamburger").
The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.
She will see the phone bill, which is due tomorrow.
She will look for her checkbook.
The check book is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two-year-old.
She'll smell something funny.
She'll change the two year old's diaper.
While she is changing the diaper, the phone will ring.
Her five-year-old will answer and hang up.
She'll remember she wants to phone a friend for coffee.
Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.
And chances are...
If she has a cup of coffee,
Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.